Just Friends . . .

"Just Friends"-andRe Christos Helios

I'll be a friend;

I won't judge.

I'll be a listening ear;

Give you hugs.

Let's do lunch.

Say around one?

Let's see a movie-

Harmless fun.

Let's have a drink-

Share some laughs.

Tell me your future,

Not your past.

When he calls,

I won't speak.

So let's do this;

Say twice a week?

Lesbianism: Romance, or Confusion?

I am not opposed to lesbianism. I have no animosity towards same-sex romance, or persons of gender ambiguity. I have lesbian friends and my barber is a masculine femme. Now that we have that disclaimer out of the way, let's move forward.

Last night was pretty interesting. Twice in one night, I had a femme tell me, "I have a girlfriend." Okay, so they have girlfriends. That is fine with me. Not a problem whatsoever. Question-Why isn't your girlfriend helping you unload your groceries? Even better-Why are you working at a sports establishment that blatantly caters to men?

I was left feeling bewildered by the end of the night. What's more confusing is that lesbians choose to date women who are masculine. It's rare that you ever see a lesbian couple and both femmes are feminine. One is feminine and the other one is a stud (i.e., a masculine femme).

Is this not a paradox? How are you a woman that has a girlfriend; yet, your "girlfriend" plays the role of a boyfriend? Again, we all have the liberty to date whomever we please. If a person wants to date a Martian, that is that person's choice, not mine, yours, or God's. In any event, I am more concerned with the root of this romance.

I'm not a psychiatrist, but I am almost certain that same-sex relations is a deep-rooted, psychological  issue. Sometimes it can be an emotional issue. In this context, I'd have to say that lesbians have either been psychologically or emotionally scarred by a male in times past. I don't need to go into specifics, but sometimes fathers, uncles, or boyfriends do the unspeakable. As a result, they are acting out their anger and frustration at the male species as a whole, instead of the person that committed the trespass, by dating women.

What our lesbian friends fail to realize is that their romance is actually confusion; they don't want to date men so they date women and to their convenience, one of the femmes happens to act like a M-A-N. This masculine femme goes out of her way to hide her breasts. She wears clothing that men generally wear. Her hair is either that of a dark ceasar, braids, or dreads with a masculine touch. And yes, she uses an artificial phallus to penetrate her girlfriend, as if she was a man.

Again, I have nothing against lesbians. I just have a few questions, Are you confused? If you are attracted to women, that is fine with me. Nevertheless, why does your "girlfriend" look like a boyfriend? Why is your "girlfriend" acting like a boyfriend? Obviously, you are still attracted to masculinity. If not, then why aren't you dating a woman that isn't masculine? Why not just date a feminine femme?

George Zimmerman: After The Verdict

I lived in Deltona, Fla. for a year before moving to Atlanta, GA. Deltona is in Volusia County. Sanford is in Seminole County. As a former resident of Florida, I can honestly say that Florida is overtly prejudice.

The jury determined George Zimmerman to be not guilty on all charges. Let us consider this fact: the jury was predominately white. Let us consider another fact: Hispanics consider themselves to be white. Let us consider one more fact: Trayvon Martin has been demonized as a thug.

Some people feel that this isn't a racial-motivated issue. One juror actually believes that Zimmerman would have acted in like manner if Trayvon was Hispanic, Asian, or white. Did I mention that Floridians aren't that smart?

I've lived in NYC for 27 years and Black men are profiled and stereotyped as criminals more than any other ethnicity.  Black men are victims of prejudice and discrimination nationwide. While living in Fla, I had to lie on an application for Walmart just to get an interview. Yes, I said that I was white.

I know Floridian atmosphere. There are overt Confederates all over Fla. This is said to dismantle the lie that Asians, Whites, and Hispanics are treated equally with African-Americans. In having saying that, I am positively certain that if it had been a White or an Asian in the same predicament that Martin was in, there would be a different outcome.

In any event, Zimmerman is not guilty and is a free man. Now what? Rallies? Protests? Riots? Modifications to the stand-your-ground law? What action is necessary to voice intolerance for injustices towards Black Americans, or Americans overall?

I believe Zimmerman's verdict is biased. On the flip side, I will say this-Blacks have to first stop killing each other before being outraged with genocide at the hands of nonblacks. More importantly, if they can gun down their fellow Black Americans for something trivial, but not take a violent, revolutionary stance towards the injustices of Black Americans, are we to really take this Trayvon Martin fiasco seriously?

Pull The Plug On Amanda Bynes

Amanda Bynes continues to make headlines with her juvenile tweets. In her latest tweet, Bynes calls the Obamas ugly. Guess what? I laughed at reading this. Know why? Why was it worth addressing? Oh, I get it-she's racist because she called a black family ugly?

Amanda has used Twitter as a source of adolescent behavior for some time now. If you ask me, I don't care and I am becoming rather annoyed by the publicity it's earning. Why? People are entertaining frivolous and irrelevant material.

For example, let's discourse Kim Kardashian for a moment. Why are people interested in Kim or her siblings? I have no clue. It's juvenile crap to me and as far as I am concerned, she isn't worth my time. Does that mean I don't think she has a sexy body? No, it doesn't; I think she has a lovely body. In any event, coverage of Kim K. happens to be of little importance. Pull the plug on her and stop giving her attention.

The same goes for this Bynes character. Her career dates back to Nickelodeon and that only means one thing-she is something to laugh at and that's it! I don't want to hear anything else about Amanda Bynes and her tweets, okay? It is not noteworthy news. Pull the plug on this expletive. It is obvious that she is seeking attention; stop giving it to her! She's a joke.

My Ideal Woman

My ideal woman isn't a sista with curves and a weave down her back. That may be the norm for most black men. I am not most black men; therefore, my preferences in a woman may be overwhelmingly different than most black men.

My ideal woman has no children. I have had relationships with single-mothers in times past. They are not for me. I can longer be romantically involved with a woman that is dependent on food stamps, child-support, and me. Did I mention that single-moms come with a mountain of issues?

My ideal woman is educated. She doesn't have to be college-educated, but she needs to be educated. Meaning what? She has to be articulate. She has to know how to express herself with words in an intelligent manner. There isn't anything wrong with speaking proper English and my ideal woman speaks grammatical English.

In addition to not being a single-mom and an idiot, my ideal woman is athletic-not muscular, but atheletic. I exercise and I want a partner that exercises. I prefer to date a woman that doesn't mind jogging, roller blading, or cycling with me. I may want to play tennis one Sunday afternoon. She has to be able to keep up.

My ideal woman is employed. She doesn't have to work in an office. Just have a job. I don't care if she works in Burger King; a check is a check. I respect a woman that earns a check rather than a woman that sits on her ass and thinks the world should be handed to her.

I want a woman that is progressive. She understands the importance of advancing herself as an individual-financially, mentally, behaviorally, and spiritually. I have dated stagnant women in times past and they are a hinderance. Any woman that doesn't believe in change isn't for me. I'm not interested in a woman that has the mentality, "This is me and I'm not changing who I am". I'm about progressing as a person and I want my partner to share the same sentiment.

My ideal woman isn't of a particular race. She can be from Mars for all I care. As long as she has the characteristics that I seek in a partner, that is all that matters to me. I'm not looking for a woman that is emotionally disturbed. I am not looking for a woman that is boisterous, belligerent, bossy, and bitchy. I'm not interested in a woman that is insecure, overly dramatic, overly sensitive, high strung, irrational, lazy, dependent, sexually provocative or promiscuous (you don't have to wear less to be sexy).

My ideal woman is serene, spiritual (you don't have to go to church to be spiritual) amiable, amicable, virtuous, hard-working, logical, unbiased, respectable, respectful, secure, not jealous, intelligent, and of course, sexy.

It's My Fault You're a Single-Mom?

This has been long overdue. I guess it has taken me so long to write and publish this because of an inner struggle. You see, there's a small part of me that really doesn't want to feel this way. Then there's another part of me-a great part of me-that has been forced to feel this way.

It is not my fault that you're a single-mom! I didn't get you pregnant at 19 just to disappear. I never fathered your children for a few years and then vanished. I don't owe you any child support. In fact, I've been everything that they weren't-a father.

Yes, I have bought diapers. I have bought birthday cards and gifts. I have helped with homework and school assignments. I have bought school supplies. I have bought school clothes. Yes, I have filled that void more than once; I have been a father to children not my own.

So why dump baggage on me? Why take out anger and disappointment on me? Did I get them pregnant, then turn my back on  her and the child? I don't even know the guys that got them pregnant; what did I do? What do I have to do with their transgressions? 

I've never had an issue with dating a single-mom in times past. Now I do. My last relationship was such a disaster in every way possible that I do not see myself romantically involved with a single-mom again.

Why? To them, I was nothing but a financial hero, not someone apart of the family. She's not really looking for you to be a husband and a father. The child or children feel the same way; you aren't the father and when the opportunity presented itself, I was reminded of that truth-I am not the father, I am just someone that is making things better for them. 

In addition, single-moms happen to be an emotional roller coaster. They have unresolved issues and have no problem dropping their load of issues on the man's shoulders. This isn't all single-moms, but a great majority. My experience with single-moms have been nothing but turmoil, hostility, and mental anguish. 

Perhaps the best thing to do is not date single-moms . . .

Paula Deen, "Nigger", and Angry Blacks.

Paula Deen, "Nigger", and Angry Blacks

There's a big stir over Paula Deen using the word nigger. Personally, I don't care; everyone uses it now. Everyone. Blacks, Hispanics, Whites, Asians-everyone says nigger.

I understand why the Food Network terminated Deen as a result of this. I also understand why Pepsi terminated its sponsorship of Mountain Dew with rapper Lil' Wayne for his offensive reference of Emmett Till in his lyrics- a business that wants customers of every race and ethnicity cannot tolerate offensive and insensitive remarks about race and ethnicity.

The daily double-why are blacks so outraged by all of this? This is a common word used in their vernacular daily and I don't see any of them getting offended when one of their own say nigger. You will hear juvenile justifications such as, "We say nigga, not nigger." Newsflash-nigga is nigger mispronounced!

In any event, Bill Maher made an interesting point regarding this controversy-terminate Deen over this situation, but rap records that uses the same language continues to be embraced? Where is the punitive actions for lyricists using nigger in their music? There isn't any.

Quite frankly, this is becoming tiresome. If blacks use nigger so frequently in their every-day-vernacular without being offended once, why get upset over Paula Deen using it? Is there really a difference? No, this is nothing more but hypocrisy and the engendering of a double standards.